How to REALLY relax in a Space?

To really relax in a space, people need to feel in control of it, that no one can intrude visually or acoustically without their permission—in other words, no one can see or hear them and they can’t see or hear anyone else clearly either.  Some private territories are permanent or at least indefinitely owned (even the surliest teenager will [probably] eventually leave home) and others are just ours for an hour or an afternoon, but whatever the case, we need to feel like we control access to really relax in the space.  A controlled space can be just part of a bigger one—it can be a high-backed chair turned to face a window that other people living in a house know to avoid when occupied, a bench in a garden under an arbour, or a home office with a sofa and a door that closes. In the space we control we need to be able to tweak the environment some.  Open or close windows, fiddle with the lights some, shift the furniture a little bit, etc.

Also, we’ll only fully de-compress when the space that we’re in aligns with our values.  So, if we’re deeply committed to protecting the Earth, to relax we need to be in a place that features planet-friendly materials/design.  Similarly, the space needs to convey messages about ourselves and groups we’re members of that we find positive.  If we’re proud of our sailing ability, for instance, one of the photos that remains on the piano mentioned earlier should be of us sailing. If we’re proud of our crafting ability, some of the things we’ve crafted should be out and about as we relax.

Design can help us quiet our frazzled nerves and feel less stressed—and science lays out how.